Have We Sacrificed Community?

I’ve pored over the Bible discussing fellowship and unity. In this era of polarization and division this would be a good thing to remember. Many churches seem to have forgotten this. Sure, most congregations look unified. What happens when the service is over? When everyone leaves the building? We all go back to our lives and struggles. This is not a community.

I have come to realize something very important about community. A community isn’t when we all gather together at an appointed time and leave. A real community is when you can call someone and know that whatever the problem is, they will pick up the phone. A real community is when people know you for both your virtues and failures. They know everything; and accept you just the same. Sadly, this is missing in our churches. This is what impacts de-churched people like me. Where can the single mother go for support? Where can the lonely elderly person call? Where can the married couple go when they are going through a difficult time? Or the person going through a spiritually dry period and are afraid to admit it? What if our beliefs change? Where is the fellowship and support?

This is the situation that de-churched people like me find ourselves in. Spiritually, I sometimes feel like a nomad. I don’t really belong in any church setting; my beliefs are unorthodox, so I defy any theological labels. It’s not always easy. I see videos from megachurches with slick pastors, and it does make me wonder if I’m not missing out. The problem is, I can’t pretend to be something I am not. I can’t go along with the politics and repeat the same empty phrases over and over.

Are We A Club or A Community?

The fact is, most churches today are just social clubs. Instead of an open and passionate community of faith, we have created a religious club where anyone who doesn’t fit the cookie-cutter mold is excluded and rejected. As much as we may not want to admit it, we are more divided in our churches than anywhere else. Fellowship means having each other’s backs—even when we’re fighting or when we disagree. It’s all well and good to talk like this, but no one really wants to live that way. We talk about unity and yet, we aren’t unified. We call each other brother and sister, yet we know the local waitress better than our ‘brothers’ and ‘sisters’.

It has not been my intention to point fingers or blame anyone. Jesus had strong words for those who proclaimed themselves to be judges of others. The de-churched generation is real, and someone needs to speak up. There are too many issues that need to be addressed in our churches. Ultimately the question every church must face is whether they want to be a club or a community? A club is safe, comfortable and profitable. A community is raw, authentic, and passionate. The truly sad thing about the failures of so many churches is that not only has it failed to reach the unbelieving, but has created a horde of disenfranchised believers like me. Something has to give. Otherwise we will continue to live in this same vicious cycle.